Flawless Lawless Strips for Spartacus!

‘Spartacus: Blood and Sand’  (t.v. series)

I am sitting here watching the series ‘Spartacus: Blood and Sand’ and trying not to laugh uproariously as I sip upon a tasty Semillon Sauvignon from the Hunter Valley.  The fight scenes are fabulous, full of gore and rippling muscle and the gratuitous nudity would be even more fabulous if there were only more of it!  There’s an awful lot of bloody bits, so don’t eat Italian whilst watching; thankfully I have a lemon-ginger roast chicken in the oven.

The music is so very reminiscent of ‘Xena: Warrior Princess’ and one feels a tinge of nauseous nostalgia at the over-use of background special effects displayed in lieu of real sets built as labours of love on the ‘Xena’ series which made it so endearing.

Lucy Lawless as Xena: Warrior Princess 

Lucy Lawless as a red-head – or is it a blonde – the chameleon hair of the entire ‘Spartacus’ series; the fiery haired feline is not a flattering look for the much-loved mistress of the fantasy screen, but is well compensated by her willingness to expose herself unnecessarily for the sake of the series.  Love it!

Lucy Lawless in her role as Lucretia

One can’t help but feel that the crew which make up the series; Lucy Lawless in her role as Lucretia, husband Rob Tappert as Producer and of course the ever essential Raimi input which make any show a worthy watch; have rather missed the mark.  During the production of the entire ‘Xena: Warrior Princess’ series all was done to insinuate nudity, sexual appetites, horror and violence without the actual explicit portrayal of such.  The series had excellent direction, brilliant storylines and fantastic characters which were wonderfully portrayed by brilliant, and for the most part, unknown and passionate actors…

‘Spartacus: Blood and Sand’ on the other hand has a pathetic storyline held together only by a wonderful display of semi-attractive fleshy bits, sensual diversions and explicit battle scenes.  (Except for Lucy – who is anything but semi-attractive!)  The actors themselves are good actors (in other films), but have nothing to work with, script wise, in this series. 

If only this ex-Xena ‘crew’ could see that if they took all the good aspects of one and merged it with all the positive aspects of the other… Well, you get my drift, surely?

Review ©  Teazy-D, Tezi Magazine

Lucy Lawless herself, FHM magazine.

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